Ep. 21: Should I Stay in Church? with Dismantle Pod
Show Notes
Episode Summary
To church or not to church, that is the question—at least for those of us who no longer claim the evangelical label. And if we do decide to stay, what do we do when we disagree with things being taught or supported either by the church or our fellow churchgoers? We sat down with Joey, the host of Dismantle Pod, to talk about why he’s chosen to not only stay in church, but even serve in many different capacities, and how he’s learned to handle differences.
Bio
Born, raised, and residing in NJ, Joey Monteleone focuses on creative communication. Whether in his career in video editing, serving as a worship leader, or hosting Dismantle Podcast, Joey aims to tell stories and create community. He is married, he and his wife have 3 kids under 5, and he loves tattoos, Marvel movies, and herbal tea.
Check out Dismantle Pod and follow along on Instagram, Twitter, and Facebook (@dismantlepod). Email Joey at dismantlepod@gmail.com.
Quotables
“I haven’t stopped deconstructing, but I also haven’t stopped loving the Church.” (tweet this)
“I don’t feel called to a building, I feel called to a people.” (tweet this)
“If Jesus died for humanity, that includes me and that includes the person I can’t stand. So instead of trying to change them, how do I build unity?” (tweet this)
“The veneer that we present is that the guy at the pulpit should have all the answers. So when that guy gets up and says, ‘Actually, I don’t have all the answers,’ that’s definitely going to rock the boat.” (tweet this)
“There’s a difference between uniformity and unity. Uniformity is when we all believe, practice, and recite the same things, whereas unity is when we’re one in spirit, purpose, and mission.” (tweet this)
“Christianity today is just too triggered. They’re looking for something to argue about, but they’re not finding ways to become one.” (tweet this)
“Unity doesn’t mean silence, it doesn’t mean going along with what’s being presented. It means doing the work.” (tweet this)
“People become angry in disagreements for 2 reasons: 1. They’re already angry; or 2. They’re not being heard.” (tweet this)
Timestamps and References
[04:12]—Joey’s faith background and what brought him to a place of deconstruction
[08:46]—Why Joey has chosen to stay in the Church despite being “progressive”
[13:41]—How the churches Joey has been part of have responded to his deconstruction and to his podcast
[22:08]—Dealing with the cognitive dissonance of staying in Church while deconstructing
[26:19]—Where drawing the line fits in with pursuing unity
[31:10]—How to have disagreements without beating someone up or being beaten up
[37:46]—Having conversations with people who are just repeating what you’ve always heard and not bringing anything new to the table
[43:55]—Not responding out of anger to people who attack
[47:17]—Using your emotional maturity to set boundaries
[53:45]—What gives Joey hope for the future of faith
[58:48]—Fun Rapid Fire questions
[01:01:58]—Unsettling Truths by Mark Charles and Soong-Chan Rah
[01:02:20]—Prayer: 40 Days of Practice by Scott Erickson and Justin McRoberts
Please follow us on social media and help us get the word out! (Also, please don’t hesitate to use any of these channels or email to contact us with any questions, concerns, or feedback.)
Support Us on Patreon
And get access to every episode 5 days early! In addition, your financial support gives us the time we need to be able to create and produce episodes. Please consider joining our team of patrons by clicking the button below. Thank you!
Credits
This episode was produced by The Sophia Society. Music is by Faith in Foxholes, and sound engineering is by Joshua Mudge.
